It's been a while since I've reviewed an EP or a demo CD-R by an unrecognized and unknown band.
From what I can tell, The Beldings are a one-man band from Indiana. The EP's five songs are fast and short with a total playing time of 4:49.
My first impression was, "What the fuck. This sounds like a white Wesley Willis but instead of a keyboard, someone gave this guy instruments."
And...I'm still under that impression. We all know most punk songs are simple and there's usually not a lot to making them, but this goes a little too far with it. Or not far enough. For example, the song "Dead By Dawn" goes "Dead by dawn, dead by dawn/You're gonna be dead by dawn/Try to run/Try to hide/It doesn't matter, you're gonna die/It doesn't matter where you go, they're gonna find you and steal your soul" for 1:03. Three chords. It's just so simple and cheesy. The song's title reminds me of this Nirvana cover band I used to play bass in too.
The other thing is, I don't get where he came up with the "Beldings" name. I mean, yeah, he's the principal from Saved By The Bell. But I don't see how that fits in with songs about horror flicks. Maybe the common denominator is shitty '80s television? It eludes me and in my opinion, the whole zombie and horror theme is way overdone and overrated and lacks substance. The Misfits did a damn good job, but their songs have catchy hooks and at the time, originality, which a lot of punk today lacks.
The Beldings - "The Beldings" EP
1. Jason Voorhees (Not a Hextalls cover)
2. My Girl's a Zombie (Not a Briefs cover)
3. Dead By Dawn (Not that Nirvana tribute band cover)
4. Night of the Living Dead (Not a Misfits cover)
5. Evil Dead (Not an Adorkables cover)
One star out of five.